Tuesday, January 25, 2011

One Semester Down and One More to Go

I must say that there were many times throughout the program that I had questioned why I was doing this?  I could get my comfortable job back making six figures (or almost, you know the economy), hour long lunch breaks, creative thinking, time off for doctor appointments and calming moments.   Why did I want non-stop questions, blank stares, lost souls, multi-tasking and a hectic-ness that only stopped during long school breaks?  Well, the reason is that I connected with the kids.  They have an energy, an innocence and a yearning to learn more that really resonates within me.  Up until that time, I questioned was it worth it.  Those outside of education think that this is a cush job but I've been on both sides of the fence and well, its not all that cushy.  Yes, I found I was less stressed.  I could make some mistakes and it was okay even expected as long as I really cared about the kids.  Because I care, I'll make less and because I care I will improve.  I get that!  It wasn't as stressful but it was way more hectic with multitasking as well as coursework that needed to be completed.  Oh yes, and there were the state tests for teachers.  I'll save my criticism of that system for another day....  Basically, many, many, many, many hoops for me to jump through to say I have the potential of becoming a good teacher.  I've always liked helping--company picnics, company charities, the community, my kids' school.  I've really found a home for that desire in teaching.

So, yesterday was my first day of my second semester.  I'm excited and very scared of all the work that needs to be done.  But I must say that it doesn't scare me as much as my Research Update for the Chemistry Department at Pfizer.  I don't have a Ph. D. but I liken a Research Update to a dissertation.  Except that you had to do it every year AND if the VP didn't like the direction of your research as presented in your talk, you were criticized in front of your peers.  My audience is more forgiving and my performance correlates to the hard work I put in upfront.  I'm sure I'll get through it just fine but then again I am my mother's daughter and love to worry about it all.